Monday, June 13, 2005


Sunday morning I woke up and met my friend Chris for a 50-mile roundtrip ride to the Botanical Gardens. I expected that we would leave at 9:00A.M., get to the Gardens at 11:00–dork around for an hour and leave at noon so I could be back for our BBQ at 2:00. These plans were not meant to be. First the group wasn’t assembled by 9:30 and there were some mechanical problems on some peoples’ bikes. Besides Chris and myself, it was apparent that these riders weren’t going to ride fast at all: hybrids and mountain bikes, people wearing jeans and flip-flops, and people who just don’t ride very much. I am used to riding with people who ride faster, and I realized that the timing wasn’t going to work At All. So I bailed, but Chris seemed to understand without my having to explain it in detail. To be honest, I was also tired and my hands were still tender, so I wasn’t too upset about missing this ride.

Instead I went to help out the Cycling Sisters’ workshop to teach riders how to ride in traffic. It was a good experience and we biked to the Hbar for brunch to practice some of the techniques. Two of the other girls were on the WNBR the night before, too. They seem pretty cool.

Best though, was that I got to speak more with Sarah Kaplan, who I hadn’t seen since Starved Rock. I dig that girl, and really respect her. Since Gilby was in town, I have gotten this really weird competitive vibe from her. She always hints that we need to race each other, either on our road bikes, or on our twin fixed gears. I don’t quite understand how this competitiveness came about, but another person confirmed it, too. Apparently, out of the blue, she has announced that she and I ride at the same speed, and that I am not actually faster than her. I really don’t care who is faster–she can certainly mop me up at a workstand. Anyway, she is very cool and we had a very cool conversation about her recently-created housing co-op, The Hub. There is a building next door to The Hub that she would like to see my zygote of a housing group purchase. That would rock, even though it involves biking through some pretty sketchy ‘hoods.

After brunch I went home and immediately began working on BBQ prep and filling up the kiddie pool. Guests trickled in and soon our apartment and lawn were infested with toddlers. Dear Lord, they were everywhere. John and Mia are several years older than me, and apparently their friends have embarked upon a breeding frenzy. All of the kids were disconcerting and LOUD. This party was a good form of mental birth control.

One of the guests works for my old law school and she and I (and later my law friends) got into major bitch sessions about the school and how much it sucks. She got drunker and drunker and her venom for the school flowed freely. She recognized most of us, or our names–and specifically remembered me from my appearance in our graduation video: I was interviewed about my law school experience and I defiantly mouthed "Fuck the Law School"– while a deep male voice said "I love the Law School" off camera. It was Hilarious. My parting gift to that wretched institution.
We told her to write an article about her ‘interview’ with us alums for the alumni magazine, and in her drunken state she thought it would be awesome: Bitter ‘03 Graduates Gripe about Law School; Two Years Later, and the Hatred is Still Strong. I don’t think this article will materialize once she sobers up, though. Too Bad.

Shawna and Diane gave me a belated B-day gift–a keychain with a condom inside. Apparently my griping about not getting laid has been heard. I told them that it was nice to know that some people are still optimistic about my chances of getting some. Shawna then replied, "don’t worry, it doesn’t expire until 2008, so you have time." Great. Tons of people think I am a complete prude because I won’t just have random hook-ups. Weirdly, two boys I was sort of flirting with overheard and joined this conversation, and now know about my pathetic lack of a sex life. Mortifying, but Funny.

Late in the night Chris showed up, much more drunk than he believed he was. The Botanical Garden ride didn’t get back into Chicago until almost 6:00–thank goodness I didn’t go. He totally understood why I bailed on the ride. We went down into the basement and talked for a long time while looking at my bikes. Mia was absolutely convinced we went down there to make out, and was very disappointed when she found out that she was wrong, "But he is so cute! and obviously into you." Maybe True, but instead we just made plans to go to the Farmer’s Market again on Wednesday morning. I am such a Dork.

By midnight I was exhausted and left most of the mess behind to crash into my bed. Once again I have plans for every night this week, and then my baby bro comes into town for another busy, busy weekend. Sleep, how I do miss you...........


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